Our Journey To China

What? No updates? (One word: Facebook)

2009-05-26T01:30:00.001-07:00

Here's Talia! (with big sis, Larissa).

In case any of you have been wondering what happened to my blog. I've now been spending my free time (what little of it I have), on Facebook. I can upload photos of OUR NEW DAUGHTER there, and stay in touch with all my family, friends and colleagues.

I invite you to join me on Facebook, and you'll be able to see what our family is up to. (By the way...I use my maiden name).

If I ever get a free week, I may retroactively enter the details of our trip to China...

In the meantime, these are photos that we took in Hong Kong (on our return trip), and recently in our home. We are so lucky for having such an happy, well-adjusted child!

Happy 1st Birthday!

2009-02-10T19:06:00.000-08:00

Ooohhh! Just look at those cheeks! I just want to pinch them right now! We were fortunate enough to receive some photos taken of Daisy on her birthday! The orphanage had forwarded the photos to Red Thread China, and Ann sent them to me this morning!

Daisy (I know...we have to decide on her 'real' name at some point) looks both bewildered and amused. I just love the grin on her face!

Wish we could have been there to help celebrate with her, but these photos will have to suffice for now. Just a few more weeks until we can actually hold her! (...and no, we still don't know when we're travelling).

Care Packages

2009-02-08T20:34:00.000-08:00

Daisy's 1st birthday is TODAY(!), and we won't be there to celebrate this milestone with her. Of course, there are so many milestones during those first few years of life, and we've already missed out on so many of them. With Larissa, we can tell you when she first rolled over, held her head up, laughed, babbled, stood up, walked, etc. We either have it all on videotape or in photographs. We threw Larissa a first birthday party with a Hawaiian luau theme, and had our tiny house brimming with friends and family.

It makes me sad that we weren't there for many of those 'firsts' for Daisy. And while Larissa will have volumes of photo albums to flip through that documented her first year of life, Daisy will only have her referral photos. If we're lucky, we may be able to get some photos of her on her first birthday. But it still won't be the same without us being there.

I contacted Ann at Red Thread China, (http://www.redth readchina.com/) and ordered a birthday care package to be sent to Daisy's orphanage. I figured if we couldn't be there, then at least allow her to receive something from us. Ann forwarded a picture of the gifts that we sent. (The candies and tea are for the orphanage director and the nannies). We also enclosed a letter which expressed our deep appreciation for all that the orphanage does in caring for these children.

I also made our own care package for Daisy, which we will be sending ourselves later this week. It includes a photo album of our family, so that we won't be complete strangers on the day we meet. We've heard all sorts of stories about kids that won't stop crying for days, because of the unfamiliarity of the "new people". We hope that Daisy will realize that we will be her 'forever family', and the sooner she sees our faces, the better.

I've spent the better part of this weekend looking up airline fares and hotel rates. We still have no idea when we'll be travelling, but if we can somehow plan it so that we avoid the Canton Trade Fair (from April 16 to April 30), then that would be great. Apparently, Guangzhou (an overcrowded city to begin with) becomes even more crowded at trade show time. (Not to mention that hotel rates double or triple!)

PHOTOS!

2009-01-24T11:58:00.001-08:00

Here she is!

Introducing...

Ling Cha Yin

We're all so thrilled to see her face. What a cutie! Looks like a pretty intense kid, though huh? I hope we can get some photos of her with a smile!

Referral file!

2009-01-23T23:30:00.000-08:00

I took time off today to pick up Daisy's file. When I went to meet our contact person, it was actually somewhat humorous, because the file that was placed in front of me was of the WRONG CHILD. (I guess there's two families that received referrals in this batch, and the names of the children are very similar.)

So...once I was in possession of the correct file, I quickly perused her information. She seems PERFECT! Of course, we still have to have her medical records reviewed by a pediatrician well-versed in 'adoption medicine', but once we have sent in our LOA (Letter of Acceptance), then we wait for China to send a TA (Travel Approval). This could take several weeks, and with the start of Chinese New Year in a few days, the CCAA may not be operating at full speed. Looks like we may not travel until April or May.

Anyways, here's what translated information I have thus far:
Name: Ling Cha Yin
Date of birth: 2/8/08
From: Shangrao Children's Welfare Center, Jiangxi Province (I mistakenly heard Guangxi yesterday in my telephone call with our agency)

From her physical exam on 9/15/08 (7 months old)
Routine schedule: 4-5 meals/day; up at 6:30 am, naps 2 hours, bed at 8:00 pm
Deep sleeper
Eating: milk, rice powder, congee, egg soup, green vegetables, noodles, soup, etc.
Motor development: holds head up, rolls from back to stomach, sits up alone, crawls (remember...this was at 7 months. Since she's almost 1 year, she's probably close to walking now...)
Personality: active; fond of playing with toys; fond of playing games, having a ready smile; closest to caretaker; loves toys with music

Now...if only we could figure out how to use our scanner, then we can get her photos posted. SHE IS ADORABLE!

Larissa is already looking forward to being a big sis to 'Daisy'. She was holding a little booklet of paper tonight, and she was pretend-writing a note. I heard her saying, "Dear Daisy, I'm really excited to see you..." as she scribbled up and down on the paper. How cute is that?

WE GOT A REFERRAL!

2009-01-22T18:07:00.000-08:00

Ok...so no photos as of yet, but we are going to become parents to a little girl!

As I was sitting at work today, keeping track of all the postings on the various websites that I follow...I kept thinking, "I wonder if we'll receive a referral in this batch?" My co-worker urged me to just call our agency and ask. (I didn't want them to think that I was an annoyance...). Anyways, just as our coordinator was about to call us, I called her, and she gave us the good news!

Name: Ling Cha Yin (sp?)
Birth date: 2/8/08
Province: Guangxi

(I actually did not get any of this info during the original call; I was so overwhelmed I forgot to ask her any questions, and I had to call back later in the day!)

Her health records and her biography will be translated and ready for us tomorrow, but I'm told that she's "very cute, chubby, and fair skinned" on the basis of her 3 photos. I'll take some time off work tomorrow to drive to SF and pick up her file.

Larissa is finally going to be a big sister!

October 2008

2008-11-12T01:06:00.000-08:00

Late entry...but better late than never.

October was a month where Roger and I actually got to spend some time alone together. Larissa was being watched by Grandma and Grandpa while we were away. First, we went to Las Vegas - for conferences. Larissa is NOT a fan of Las Vegas, since she still has bad memories of staying at The Venetian and seeing images of Blue Man Group in the lobby last year. ("Ahhh!...blue guys! blue guys!") She was more than happy to stay home with the grandparents when she found out that Roger and I had meetings to attend. Since my conferences were shorter, I got to spend some time shopping, and when Roger finished, we had some fantastic meals at the nicer restaurants in town.

A few weeks later, my employer sent all of its employees (and guests) on a San Francisco Bay cruise, during Fleet Week. We enjoyed a nice lunch, and saw an amazing show put on by the US Navy Blue Angels. Larissa probably would not have liked it due to the high decibels. Roger and I just liked being able to do something with other adults.

The rest of the month? Well, as usual, almost everything is focused on Larissa.

Visits to the pumpkin patch, birthday parties, school carnivals, carving pumpkins, trick-or treating...all the usual kid stuff. Larissa always gets to pick out the design of the pumpkin carving, and this year, she chose "Cinderella". She's always been very careful around sharp instruments, so I've been letting her actually poke out the outline of the design for the past few years. I think she did a great job!

For the record, Larissa was an Ohio State University cheerleader this year for Halloween. Both her grandfather and I are graduates of THE Ohio State University, and Larissa already dressed up as a Stanford cheerleader (well...technically, we never had cheerleaders, but that's a topic for another day), a few years ago. When Larissa was given the choice this year of either wearing a red or blue cheerleader outfit, she chose red. Had she chosen blue, we would have gotten a Cal Bears outfit for her!

September 2008

2008-10-11T01:36:00.000-07:00

We've been so incredibly busy...and we only have one child! I can't imagine what it will be like to have two...

Larissa turned 5 on September 4th. Although I had promised Roger that we would just do a small party with Larissa's closest friends, it ended up being the most elaborate party we've done thus far. We did have a small gathering on her actual birthday, but the larger party was done the following weekend. I hired a party planner who decorated the table, (I decorated the house a bit in the preceeding weeks...just to add some embellishment), ran all the activities, and brought in the entertainment. The theme was Cinderella's Ball, so of course, Cinderella attended. The girls dressed up in pink princess gowns, and ate from real china! I had little tea sandwiches for both the adults and the kids. The cake basically looked like Cinderella's castle. (Photo shows the cake without the spun glass castle that was eventually placed on top of the white clouds).

I know what you're all thinking...you see those pictures above, and you think, "...but there's only 9 kids! I've seen parties where there's 30 kids". I guess that's where the timing of Larissa's birthday works in our favor. Early September birthday: if you haven't spent much time over the summer with your friends from the previous year, (and you don't think they'll be playing much together in the future), then do you really need to invite them? And for her current classmates, she didn't really know any of them yet. I'm sure that as she gets older, we'll be throwing those parties where her entire class is invited. For now, a medium sized party at home was ideal.
Five is somewhat of a milestone age; we probably won't do another big party until she turns 10.) Then again, you only turn 6 once...

After getting the entire house painted a few weekends later (yes...the painters finished in one day!), we celebrated Grandpa Richard's 79th birthday on September 28th. Had a wonderful Sunday brunch in San Francisco at the Carnelian Room, with an amazing view of the entire bay. It has become our 'go to' place for special occasions. Exquisite food, wonderful service, and a breathtaking view.

Larissa and I have taken up Bollywood dancing. Her kids class will be performing in a show in November, but mine won't. (Apparently not enough adults were willing to go on stage. Not me...I was looking forward to performing!). Anyways, it should be fun. Between her ballet/tap and Bollywood dance classes, and her twice weekly taekwondo lessons (by the way...she's now up to a Yellow Advanced belt), we're always on the go. I guess keeping ourselves busy distracts us from the waiting. We are two LID months away from being matched with Daisy...

August Activities

2008-09-01T16:21:00.000-07:00

We were busy this past month with end-of-the- summer activities. Larissa participated in a back-to-school fashion show at Nordstrom, and suprisingly was willing to do it! See the picture at on the side? That's her walking down the runway wearing an outfit she picked out herself! I have no intention of having her become a child model, but I think it helps her self-confidence to participate in activities like this. What a great girl!

Larissa started Kindergarten! She LOVES school, and is having so much fun making new friends, and playing with her previous friends from preschool. That's her with her Kindergarten teacher below.

It's only been one week, but we haven't had any problems waking her each morning. For those of you who don't know us and our schedule, Larissa and I are night owls. Prior to starting Kindergarten, she and I were going to bed each night around 1:00 or 2:00 am. She would then wake up around 10:00 am and proceed with her usual activities. Now that she is in the AM session of Kindergarten, we have to get her to bed by midnight, and wake her up at 7:00 am. What gets her motivated? The thought of watching her favorite TV show (Fetch! With Ruff Ruffman - a PBS kid reality show) that we recorded at 12:30 am the night before! I know...I know...I shouldn't let our child watch TV, but we need something to get her up!

Other random items:

Larissa now has her TaeKwonDo yellow belt, and will hopefully be testing for her yellow-advanced belt later this month.

In addition to taking her weekly ballet and tap lessons, Larissa is now enrolled in Bollywood dance lessons. (She saw the movie: The Cheetah Girls - One World, and decided she wanted to dance like the girls in the movie...)

Roger and I are still waiting for our referral. To date, expedited families with LID's up to December 2006 have been matched. No expedited families were matched in the August batch, so hopefully, the January 2007 LID's will get their referrals in the September batch!

Expedited Referrals

2008-07-24T13:01:00.000-07:00

The process of Chinese international adopting is long and tedious. The first part (the paperchase) consists of getting various documents ranging from medical exams, FBI checks, fingerprinting, to a home study (where a social worker will come to your home to interview the prospective adopting parents - PAP's). All the documents need to be notarized and authenticated, then translated into Chinese, before the entire dossier is forwarded to China. The 'date-to-China' (DTC) is a big deal, but the more important date is the 'log-in-date' (LID). By following the LID's of other PAP's you can determine how far along the CCAA is in matching children to families. You start getting excited once the LID's are approaching your own. Our LID is 3/21/07.

Once your dossier is in China, it follows one of two 'tracks'. The regular track is followed by most PAP's that apply for international adoption. However, if one has Chinese ancestry, then one can be expedited. How can one 'qualify' as Chinese? Having Chinese blood is not sufficient. Only if one can prove that he/she was born in the People's Republic of China, Taiwan (China), or Hong Kong, China, then a couple can be expedited. Or if one set of prospective grandparents can provide documentation that they were born in China, Taiwan, or Hong Kong, then the PAP's can be expedited. We would qualify for expedited status because Roger's birth certificate states his place of birth was Hong Kong. So when our dossier was submitted to China, we requested expedited status, but... there is really no way of knowing which 'track' we are on.

That is where Roger and I are at. The referrals for the non-expedited families are up to LID of 1/25/06, whereas the referrals for expedited families are up to 12/06. At the rate that the CCAA is matching non-expedited families, it may be 2012 before we get a referral. If that's the case, I think we would give up. As difficult as that might be (especially for Larissa), I think we would prefer to move on with our lives and be able to do things as a family of three. (And I could go ahead and sell all of those clothes and toys I've been saving...). However, if we are expedited, then we may be looking at a referral before the end of 2008! The next few months will be very interesting indeed.

4th of July / Where do babies come from?

2008-07-07T00:58:00.001-07:00

At the last minute, Roger & I decided to spend a weekend in San Francisco with Larissa, and catch the fireworks from an amazing vantage point - The Carnelian Room - on the 52nd floor of the Bank of America building. It led to a great weekend.

We don't usually get 2-day weekends like most folks, since Roger works on Saturdays, so we don't usually do weekend getaways. With July 4th falling on a Friday, we were able to leave for the city in the early afternoon, and check-in at the Parc55 Hotel (in Union Square) by 3pm. In the past 5 years, we've only seen 3 movies at the theater - some James Bond flick, Shrek 3, and Enchanted. (We won't discuss our obsession with Jersey Boys...and the fact we saw it 3 times...in 5 months). Anyways, with Larissa interested in martial arts at present, we decided to see Kung Fu Panda. Aside from being very entertaining, it teaches a great lesson...'believe in yourself'...which I hope Larissa gets.

Our wish of seeing fireworks didn't come true, since the only view we got from the restaurant was THICK FOG. But it didn't matter...we had a seen a fun movie, shopped in downtown SF, had great meal, topped with yummy chocolates we had picked out earlier. (Larissa was more excited about the chocolates that the maids at the hotel left us.) The following day was just as fun, as we had brunch at Sears Fine Foods, shopped in Union Square, snacked at Citizen Cake, and then had an amazing sushi dinner with friends.

But the most memorable part of this weekend? While driving to SF, Larissa said to us (out of the blue), "I don't want to have a baby in my tummy!" After reassuring her that big sisters don't have babies, and that mommies have babies...she then asked, " So did I come from your tummy?", which was soon followed by, " How did I get there?" (...and she's only 4 years old). We decided to use the whole "mommy...daddy...it's like magic" answer, but I'm sure we'll have to address the whole adoption issue - biologic child vs. non-biologic child at some point. Here's hoping we'll be able to explain that adequately.

Shopping Trip

2008-07-01T21:37:00.000-07:00

So I took a day off from work for my birthday on June 30th. Spent the day at the local mall with my mom and Larissa. We were looking for dresses for ME. I usually go to the mall every 1-2 weeks, but I always emerge with bags and bags of stuff for Larissa. (She looks good in everything...). But this time we were shopping for ME. We're going to a wedding in Oregon in a few weeks, and I need something 'fun'.

Shopping with a child is a wonderous experience. This was the first time I actually spent a few hours with Larissa (in her talking phase) at the mall. She NEVER stopped talking the entire 4.5 hours! She became my 'fashion consultant', finding the right sizes, constantly picking out clothes for me...running from one display to the next saying, "THIS one is very FASHIONABLE...", "THIS one would be PERFECT for Abby's wedding...". "THIS is a size ____!" (Thanks Larissa...I always wanted everyone at Nordstrom to know my size...). Not only was she helping me, but then when it was time to pick out clothes and items for grandma, she started yelling out the bra size everytime she eyed the proper size! (I'm sure Grandma Elise always wanted her bra size announced by a 4 year old in the middle of Macy's.)

The most hilarious part was when I was trying on the clothes in the dressing room. I was looking for something that would both 1. cover my knees, and 2. camouflage my tummy. At one point, when I put a dress on that showed too much 'lumpy-ness', Larissa blurted out: "...but mommy...your boobs and your tummy ARE lumpy!"

Rumor

2008-06-28T01:23:00.000-07:00

The CCAA (Chinese Center for Adoption Affairs) is rumored to have started the next round of referrals. Let's hope that the expedited families with LID's in Dec. 2006 are all matched this time. That would hopefully put us on track to receive our referral in October this year... and Daisy could be here before the end of the year! What a wonderful Christmas present that would be...

I just hope that our dossier makes it out of review without any issues, and that we ARE indeed considered an expedited family. (If not, the wait may be until 2010(!) and I'm not sure we want to wait that long).

Let's keep our fingers crossed and hope for some matches before July 4th!

SHE'S A STAR!

2008-06-23T00:57:00.000-07:00

We're so thrilled! Larissa was incredibly brave, and was able to dance on stage for her first recital on Sunday! Not only that, she said it was FUN! We're so proud of her...

(Larissa is the 4th from the right - the one that's posing with her right knee bent in...If you look closely, you can see the hair extension/ponytail sticking up in the back...)

If only you could have heard all the conversations over the past 8 months.

We tried bribes:

"If you dance...I'll take you to Disneyworld",

"If you dance...I'll buy you a Power Wheels car",

"If you dance...I'll get you this _____________(toy, candy, game, etc)".

None of those worked.

We tried threats:

"If you don't dance, we'll put you into swim lessons..." (She HATES the water).

"If you don't dance, we'll wash your hair every night..." (Once again, that fear of water)

Those didn't work.

We're not sure what convinced her to perform, but we're certainly glad she did. Kids have a mind of their own, and once they've made up their minds about something, it's incredibly difficult to change their opinion. (Even at the age of 4!)

Makes one wonder what life will be like when Larissa's 13...

2008-06-17T01:35:00.000-07:00

So here's our little dancer. This was taken in our dining room a few weeks ago, when I was trying to figure out how to style Larissa's hair for the upcoming recital. After struggling with a curling iron for over 30 minutes, and getting absolutely NOTHING. I went to the local mall the following day and bought a ponytail extension. I'll post that picture when I get a chance.

Busy week

2008-06-14T13:49:00.000-07:00

These past few weeks have been so busy! Even though we only have Larissa at this time, our schedules are always packed. Last week, Larissa graduated from her preschool. There was a little graduation "ceremony" at a local park, where she was given a certificate/diploma. Grandma Elise and Grandpa Richard were able to attend. and Larissa had such a nice time with her friends!

Larissa also has weekly dance lessons, where she is learning ballet and tap. Her first show is next week, and there was a dress rehearsal this morning. For the past few months, she has adamantly refused to dance for the show, but I think she is slowly overcoming her stage fright. We'll see how it goes next Sunday!

Twice a week, Larissa has taekwondo lessons. She just started 4 weeks ago, so she's currently a white belt. She seems determined to become a black belt, and we think she'll succeed! It's one of those activities that seem to come naturally for her.

It's so nice to be able to let Larissa enjoy all these activities, since her days as an 'only' may be coming to an end soon. The China Center for Adoption Affairs (CCAA) has recently started matching Chinese Expedited Referrals again, after about a 5 month break. The November 2006 waiting families were matched with children this past week. With a March 2007 LID, we may only be another 4 months away from getting our referral!

First entry

2008-06-10T14:17:00.001-07:00

It's hard to believe we've been waiting over a year for Daisy. We've been referring to "Child #2" as "Daisy", because that's the name Larissa wants. Roger and I would like to name her Irina, in keeping with the Russian origin of Larissa's name. The meaning of Larissa is 'cheerful', which is definitely very appropriate for her. The meaning of Irina is 'peace', which is what I'm hoping for, because the longer we have to wait for her, the older I'm getting...and I'm not sure I want a rambuncious child running around the house!